


Well You'd Better Go Catch It!

by dsa_archivist



Category: due South
Genre: Episode Related, Humor, M/M, Romance, Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 1999-05-03
Updated: 1999-05-03
Packaged: 2018-11-10 18:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11132547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dsa_archivist/pseuds/dsa_archivist
Summary: A drunk Mountie and a late night phone call lead to an interesting night for Ray.





	Well You'd Better Go Catch It!

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Speranza, the archivist: this story was once archived at [Due South Archive](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Due_South_Archive). To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in June 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Due South Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/duesoutharchive).

...Well You'd Better Go Catch It
    
    
     Ok, who else thought the ending of SOME LIKE IT
    RED was a tease?:->  I loved it!  Ray telling Fraser what a nice looking
    woman he'd made.  Then the teasing that Fraser wasn't his type and then
    when asked he described the type he liked and it sounded like a certain
    mountie we all know and love.  Fraser's hurt response to Ray asking what
    his plans were for after work getting that great response "Nothing with
    YOU."  "Don't get in a snit!"  I still laugh thinking about it.  Well
    it inspired me to write this latest story  " ...WELL YOU'D BETTER GO
    CATCH."  I've been hitting you all with dramatic stories of late and
    you're 'due'  a lighthearted one for a change. This one takes up that
    same night after the events in SOME LIKE IT RED.

**Usual warning:  
this is a relatively tame m/m story.**

# "... WELL YOU'D BETTER GO CATCH IT"
    
    
    It was around 12:30 in the morning, an exhausted Ray had
    finished up his report on the events at St Fortunata's girl
    school late that night.  He'd just gotten home an hour ago
    and to sleep a little after that.  But now his peaceful
    slumbering was shattered by the cellular phone ringing on
    the bed side-table.  Ray didn't open his eyes or move his
    head, just one hand reached out blindly groping for the
    intrusive object.  Placing it to the ear that was not melded
    to his pillow, sleepily he spoke into the mouthpiece. "'lo
    Vecchio."  He couldn't quite make out the voice on the other
    end, which sounded slurred, not making any sense and
    giggling.  He thought he heard it say, "Is your
    refrigerator running?", but it was badly garbled.  In
    annoyance he was about to hang up thinking it was a crank
    call, until he recognized that giggle, and he started to
    become more awake with concern. "Fraser?  Is that you?  Are
    you ok?  Where are you?"  The strange sounding mountie on
    the other end was annoyed at him for not playing his game
    with him. "No Ray, yur s'posed to say... s'pose t'say
    'Yesss'. Or am I s'pose t'say that?"  This behavior was very
    unlike Fraser. "Benny what's wrong with you?  Have you been
    drinking?"  The voice on the other end was perplexed.  "I
    don't r'mber.  Oh yeah.  Dragon lady gave me a glass of
    glendur.. glenflora.. glenda... I knew a Glenda once...  I
    named my pet otter Glenda... poooor Glenda.  I see her every
    time I take off my shirt."  This last part was said with a
    drunken melancholy.  Ray had never seen his friend drunk, or
    for that matter take a drink, not even one glass or sip.
    
    Ray was fully awake now and worried about his friend. "Benny
    where are you?  I'll come to you.  Ok?"  The voice on the
    other end sounded happy at that bit of news. "'kay Ray.
    I'm... well... I don't know where am right now...  I'm
    lossss."  His voice sounded a bit panicky at not knowing
    where he was. "Don't worry Benny.  I'll find you.  Just
    describe what's around you.  I'll try to locate you that
    way."  A more confident sounding Fraser replied. "So'kay
    Ray.  I have my compass.  Juss go..."  Fraser gave some
    coordinates that made no sense whatsoever to Ray.  "Humor me
    Benny, describe what's around you, ok?"  "'kay Ray.  There's
    a big BIG building and then some little little ones nearby.
    There's a traffic light with pretty blinking red and yellow
    lights on, like a crisssmasss tree.  Then... I don't know
    what that is.  Oh yeah, now I 'member..." - he giggled -
    "... its a church."
    
    At first the descriptions had him thinking he'd never find
    Ben, then he latched on to the church Benny just mentioned.
    "What's the church's name Benny?"  Fraser was quiet for a
    minute, then started spelling "B I N G G O .. Oops...  just
    one 'g' Ray...  Where was I?  T O N I G H T.  That's a
    strange name for a church Ray?  Wonder why they changed the
    name to that from St Michael's?"  Ray had been getting
    exasperated when he realized what Fraser was spelling, but
    breathed a sigh of relief when his friend finally gave him a
    clue to his whereabouts.  There was a phone booth across the
    street from St Michael's, the church run by Fraser's and his
    acquaintance Father Behan.  "Benny I know where you are.
    Stay put ok?  I'll be there in a few minutes."  Ray couldn't
    help but shake his head and smile resignedly, when he heard
    the next words. "Ray I don't want to stay in this box no
    more, its making me clustrafobig."  He compromised with him.
    "Then stand next to it ok?"
    
    While he'd been talking with Fraser this whole time, he'd
    been getting dressed rapidly to go to his friend.  He was
    still talking to him on the phone as he made his way out the
    door, because Fraser wouldn't let him hang up.  "Ray, its
    lonely here.  I don't want to be here.  No one to talk to."
    Reassuring his friend as he turned the ignition on, "I'm on
    my way Benny.  I'll stay on the line with you."  Fraser got
    drunkenly sappy on him. "You're my bess fren.  I love you
    Ray."  Ray was amused and touched by this at the same time.
    "Yeah, well I care about you too Benny.  Else why would I
    drag my butt out of bed at this hour to pick you up?"
    Fraser was happy. "You care about me Ray?  Thass nice...
    You're nice... Hey watch this..."  Ray couldn't help but
    laugh. "Benny I can't see what you're doing."  The voice on
    the other end responded in a way that made it sound like the
    next words were the most logical argument to counter what
    Ray had just said, "Oh, then tell me how come I can hear
    you?"
    
    He was relieved when he finally turned the corner of the
    street where St Michael's was and there was Benny standing,
    across the street from it like he'd thought, with the phone
    to his ear, but the chord stretched out so he could move a
    little bit out of the booth.  He pulled up along the side of
    the curb.  Ray said into the cellular phone, "Benny, turn
    around.  I'm here now."  The smile that lit up Ben's face
    when he saw him was dopey but heartwarming.  Benny certainly
    was an amusing cheerful drunk, unlike...  Ray's mood changed
    briefly as bitter memories snuck in from having had an
    alcoholic father.  He quickly got out of the car and moved
    to Fraser's side placing an arm around his friend's waist
    and Ben's arm around his shoulder.  When he went to do this
    Ben squirmed slightly at his touch. "Ray that tickled."
    "Sorry Benny."  "So'kay.  I liked it."  Definitely a happy
    drunk - too happy - Ray decided.  He wasn't used to drunk
    people telling him that they loved him or that they thought
    he was nice or smiled with such joy when they saw him or
    liked his touch.  His father certainly never did any of
    those things the many times Ray scraped him off one barroom
    floor or another and sobered him up, if he could.  Ray
    cringed at the memories of his angered father fighting him
    when he tried to bring him home.  Fraser was so different,
    he actually wanted to go with him and passively let Ray
    place him in the car.  Settling his friend into the
    passenger seat, he then went round to the driver's side and
    soon they were headed for Fraser's apartment.
    
    Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Fraser studying
    him intently, without saying a word.  Suddenly he felt a
    finger run lightly down his nose from the bridge to the tip.
    It startled him. "Benny?!  Hey I'm drivin'.  Don't do that!"
    Fraser tilted his head to the side, one eye closed, thumb
    out like an artist, to look at Ray's profile.  "I like your
    nose Ray.  Its got character."  An amused Ray responded.
    "Thanks Benny.  And I like your nose too."  Fraser started
    to play around with touching his own nose and moving it
    around, eventually coming to a decision. "No, I like your's
    better."  They'd made it to the apartment complex, all the
    while there Fraser kept studying him, periodically making
    strange - yet somehow flattering - comments about his
    features, almost as if he were describing or planning a
    piece of artwork, with Ray as his subject.
    
    Inside his friend's apartment now he escorted a weaving as
    he walked Fraser over to the bed and sat him down.  Kneeling
    down in front of him he removed his boots.  Then he started
    on his friend's pants, unhooking the suspender clips to them
    and removing them, until Ben was in his underwear.  He then
    started to undress his friend out of that uniform jacket to
    make him more comfortable.  That's when he felt fingers at
    his shirt undressing him as well.  Grabbing at them quickly
    and pushing away the hands that had already amazingly
    managed to swiftly undo a few of his own buttons.  "Benny
    stop that."  He was starting to feel uncomfortable now.
    What was going on here?  Ben looked hurt and puzzled by his
    words and actions.  "But I thought?  Well you were
    undressing me.  I'm sssurry Ray."  Ben's eyes reflected
    shame and were quickly cast down.
    
    Fraser was starting to look a little green around the gills
    now.  "Ray, I don' feel so good."  He'd barely gotten the
    words out when Ben threw up.  Ben looked miserable and Ray
    felt disgusted, but slightly sympathetic, as he whined out.
    "Yuck!  Benny!  That's more clothes of mine you've managed
    to ruin."  Ben's soulful repentant blue eyes looked deep
    into his own. "I'm ssssurry Ray."  He forgave him easily.
    "Its ok Benny.  I know you didn't do it on purpose.  You
    really didn't do it on purpose, right?"  Ben nodded, but
    then a flash of a devilish half-smile peeked out, which he
    couldn't quite conceal.
    
    Benny had fared better than he had, at least the uniform
    jacket and pants had been spared.  Ray ended up having to
    remove his own shirt, which left his chest bare.  He hadn't
    put on an undershirt in his haste to get to Benny earlier.
    The way Ben was watching him when he took it off, really
    made him feel awkward.  But he pushed the feeling to the
    side, internally saying, *Naw.  I'm imagining things.  He's
    just drunk.*, and continued with the task at hand.  He
    finished cleaning up his friend, the bed and himself as best
    he could.  When he leaned over too close to Benny at one
    point, he felt a feather light tracing of fingers over the
    shrapnel and bullet scars on his chest near his shoulder, a
    gentle whisper went along with it. "Those were for me."  Ray
    shivered pleasurably and sucked in a breath in response to
    the seductive touch and words, but then pulled himself away
    quickly, angry at himself for actually liking the way Ben
    just touched him.  Responding quickly a shaken Ray moved
    away from the bed.  "Yeah, well at those times I thought you
    were worth it."
    
    Going rapidly over to Ben's dresser, he pulled out one of
    the flannel shirts there and put it on himself.  It was too
    large for him, and hung loosely on his thin frame, but it
    was better than nothing right now.  Ray was afraid of the
    way things were going between himself and Ben.  Ben was
    definitely coming on to him in his drunken state.  It
    worried him.  Probably left over from their teasing comments
    to each other when Fraser had been undercover dressed as a
    female teacher at St Fortunata's.  Had he really danced with
    Benny?  Disco at that, he reminded himself and shuddered.
    Then those comments he'd made to Fraser about his making a
    nice looking woman and Ben's hurt response when he said he
    wasn't his type.  They were joking around weren't they?  He
    wondered now if Benny had been hinting at something more
    than that.  Ray was confused enough with his love life with
    women, let alone having to consider one with a man.  Was he
    even considering it?  *Naw.  Maybe?  Naw.*  END PART 1 OF 2  
    
    Ben wasn't thinking or acting clearly right now and Ray was
    sure he'd be upset by his behavior when he sobered up.
    Fraser was smiling at him. "Ray I always knew you were a
    flannel man deep down." and he fell back on his pillow
    giggling at what he thought was the funniest thing he'd ever
    said.  Ray closed his eyes briefly, shaking his head and
    sighing.  "Benny just go to sleep already will ya?"  Ben had
    that mischievous smile again. "Can't."  "Why?"  "Cuz you're
    not here."  "What?  I'm standing right here."  "No here."
    and he patted the bed next to him.  Now that was a definite
    invitation and Ray wasn't about to take up the offer.
    
    "Benny I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you're
    drunk.  How much did you and Thatcher drink of that
    Glendorlan stuff?"  Benny looked hurt, then scrunched up his
    face in concentration as he worked at the mental challenge
    his friend just gave him.  He was petulant and his fingers
    came up close to his eyes as if measuring something, "I'm na
    drunk.  I only had one teensy tiny teeny little glass.  She
    made me.  She wazzz sooooooo sssad.  Her friend stood her
    up.  But now that I think of it, could swear I was drinkin'
    it, but never ssseem to empty."  Benny's pointer finger came
    up and swung around a bit in confidence.  "Now I r'mber.
    She muss have been toppin' off my glass when wazzen lookin'.
    Dragon lady she'zzz sneaky.  She also kizzzed me and then...
    then I didn't want to do... 'you know'... and then... then I
    called you.  You take care of me."  "Yes I do."  "Thankz
    kind Ray."
    
    Ray was steamed at what he heard happened to his friend
    tonight.  He knew what Thatcher was like, he didn't dub her
    with the nickname "Dragonlady" for nothing.  He could always
    sense there was some kind of attraction between her and
    Benny.  He knew Ben pretty well.  Ray had to admit to
    himself that Ben was a very attractive man.  Women were
    always trying to seduce and manipulate him.  Most of the
    time he didn't seem to realize it - Ray did - but when Ben
    did notice, it made him uncomfortable.  Women scared him
    when they came on so strong - like Ray's own sister Frannie
    - but he was too polite and naive to respond back strongly
    that he wasn't interested or just didn't like that approach;
    he had a hard time standing up for himself in situations
    like this.
    
    Ray was seriously considering having a 'little chat' with
    Thatcher tomorrow, because he knew Ben would never do it for
    himself.  She'd definitely overstepped her bounds as
    Fraser's boss.  He'd threaten her with a sexual harassment
    case for what she'd done to Benny tonight.  He figured she
    filled him full of that expensive liquor, thinking she'd get
    part of her investment returned in another way.  Ray didn't
    like the thought of Thatcher treating Ben like a gigolo.
    His angry thoughts were interrupted.  "Ray I still don' feel
    good."  Ray recognizing that tone and look was there in a
    flash with a bucket just in time.  He sat next to his
    forlorn looking friend with his hand first at the back of
    his head, then it was rubbing his back.  "That feels nice
    Ray."  He stopped immediately, realizing what he was doing.
    "Please don't stop Ray."  Ray moved further away from his
    forward friend. "Ben you don't know what you're saying.  YOU
    ARE DRUNK.  And you don't smell too good right now either."
    Ben winked at him. "We can always take a shower Ray."  Ray
    was at his wit's end.  "Ugh!  Benny just give it up already,
    ok?  Believe me you wont be happy about what you're saying
    to me now when you sober up in the morning.  Capeesh?"
    Fraser looked annoyed. "Ray you are such a pooper party..
    party poofer...", he was laughing at himself trying to say
    'party pooper' and soon after finally fell asleep, which
    made Ray very thankful.  He made himself as comfortable as
    possible, which wasn't very, on his friend's camping bedroll
    and mat, which he unrolled next to the bed.  He didn't want
    to leave his friend in this state and knew from too much
    experience that Ben would wake up feeling terrible in the
    morning.
    
    The morning light streamed in through all the windows,
    waking Ben up unpleasantly.  Ray had already been up and
    about the apartment for about an hour, having showered and
    groomed earlier and was now busily working in the kitchen on
    a special concoction to help his soon to be hurting friend.
    A couple of minutes ago he peeked over when he heard noises
    of discomfort at the sorry state Fraser found himself in.
    Fraser had been lying in the bed, eyes squinting, then
    throwing one arm over them in an attempt to lock out the
    pain the light was causing him.  When his cure-all was
    ready, Ray entered the bedroom.  "Good morning Prince
    Charming.  Here drink this."  Still not quite ready to face
    the daylight or Ray he didn't move to take the proffered
    glass.  Fraser still had his eyes covered with one arm, but
    the other waved towards Ray as if to say go away and take
    that with you. "I don't want to drink anything EVER again.
    Never.  Never.  Never again."  Ray grabbed hold of the
    waving hand and placed the glass in it, with his hand
    holding both glass and his friend securely together.  "It'll
    help.  Its a secret Vecchio family recipe that'll put the
    spring back in your step in no time.  Trust me on this.
    Unfortunately its one thing I know more about than you."
    
    Fraser sat up a little on the bed, face scrunched up and
    blue eyes just slits as he brought the funny colored thick
    liquid towards his nose to sniff at it first.  He didn't
    like the look or the smell of it too much, but seeing Ray's
    stern face over the rim forced him to taste it.  He
    tentatively took a sip, then smiled. "It smells and looks
    worse than it tastes.  Its not as bad as some things I've
    put in my mouth before.  Its better than I thought it would
    be."  Ray handed him some aspirin to take with it.  "I
    didn't ask for a gourmet review Benny.  Just drink it!"
    "You're awfully grouchy this morning Ray."
    
    Ray hadn't gotten enough sleep, the floor he'd been sleeping
    on had been hard and to top it all off he still didn't feel
    right about what happened between them last night.  "Well
    Benny you did wake me up in the middle of the night to give
    me a crank call.  You did throw up all over my shirt, so I
    have to wear this thing - which is not my style at all - it
    was considerate of you to wait until we were out of the Riv
    though.  Then you said all those weird things to me.  I
    slept on your floor... And you wonder why 'I'm' grouchy?!"
    
    Fraser winced at his friend's tone, which was joining the
    din in his throbbing head, but still seemed to sincerely
    mean his next words.  "Sorry Ray.  Thanks for looking out
    for me.  Alright you can be grouchy if you want to be.  Just
    please do it quietly alright?"  Ray couldn't stop himself
    from smiling, "Don't worry about it.  Just don't make this a
    habit ok?".  Fraser shook his head dejectedly. "You don't
    have to worry about that.  My drinking days are over."  With
    that said he finished the hang-over remedy Ray gave him and
    made his way to the bathroom to clean up.
    
    A short time later a more human looking towel wrapped Fraser
    came out looking through his dresser for clothes.  Ray tried
    not to pay attention to the fact that his friend was
    practically naked in front of him and how that was starting
    to make him react.  It would be so easy to just go over and
    slip that towel off.  Ray shook his head to clear it of that
    type of thinking and decided it was time for him to leave.
    "Ah Benny, if you're ok now, I'm gonna get going.  Do you
    need anything?"  Fraser turned to him, clothes piled in his
    hands now. "Yeah, actually, an explanation.  Last night was
    a bit of a blur and well... um... I seem to recall...
    well... never mind..."  The opening was there now.  Ray
    debated with himself whether or not to jump this latest
    hurdle in their friendship.  His curiosity got the better of
    him.  "Never mind what Benny?  You're my closest friend, you
    should know by now you can talk to me about anything."
    
    Fraser was turning a bit red and there was discomfort
    written all over him as he asked. "Ray did we... this is
    silly... I must be imagining things... forget it."  Ray had
    a feeling he knew where this was leading.  "What Benny?"  He
    swallowed hard then managed to get it out. "Did we 'you
    know'.  I seem to recall my touching your chest and...
    well... not acting in a proper manner towards you." Fraser
    looked so worried and serious he couldn't help but use his
    quirky sense of humor as a way of handling the awkwardness.
    "Benny I'm hurt you don't remember.  Of course we d..."
    Before he could finish, Fraser's shocked expression and
    words tumbled out. "Ray, I'm so sorry.  I behaved just as
    badly to you as Thatcher did to me.  Please forgive me."
    Ray let him off the hook. "Forgive you for what?  Nothing
    happened.  You didn't take advantage of me and I'd never
    take advantage of you when you're drunk.  I'm not that big
    of a jerk."  Fraser gave Ray a suggestive questioning look.
    "Would you take advantage of me when I'm sober?"  Ray came
    to a decision then.  "Only if you wanted me to."  Fraser
    came so temptingly close to him then, warm breath touching
    his ear whispering seductively, "I want you to."   Ray was
    right, it was so easy to just slip that towel off.  
    
    THE END         
    
    

* * *


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